How we respond to everything is a choice. The more we choose that route, and the more we defend it, the better we get at making that same choice every time.
It doesn’t feel like a choice because our choices are learned, our belief systems are set, and it would take some internal rearranging to change them. When we try to think and respond differently, it’s uncomfortable, and it may not feel right. It may not scratch our itch. It may make us feel more vulnerable, take us out of our routine pace, make us a little bit wrong. The crap we are used to may feel more organized, less chaotic, even if we can recognize how chaotic it already is.
But it does open up possibility for change, if a different result is what we are looking for. Because when we keep thinking and responding the same way (perhaps just doing it a little bit harder next time!), expecting a different result, having decided that we are right and everything and everyone else are wrong… well, let’s just own that part of our own insanity.