Ways to Increase Connection
September 25, 2010 § Leave a comment
Be honest. It will clear the obstacles from your life and allow others to give you the support you really need. It will bring back your voice, the one you lost many moons ago. It will bring to you a great sense of relief. There is a surrendering in honesty. A surrendering, not of your personal power to an external force, but of your own inner monster to your next most radiant Self. Surrender is the foundation for personal power. There is a saying: you are as sick as your secrets.
Acknowledge what you want. The objects of your desires are not what cause suffering. It is the suppression of the desire (a self-denial) or the identification to it (the great illusion) that causes suffering. Our desires guide us to our bigger hungers. An unquenchable desire for material things may mean a misdirected hunger for intimacy and true connection to others.
Embrace Tantrums and Mistakes. Tantrums are okay. Kids have them, and then they move on. As adults, we carry them for years. We don’t have them because they make everyone else uncomfortable, which makes us uncomfortable. The result is that our upsets come out sideways. I’m sure you’ve seen sideways. Very scary. As human beings, we are loaded with emotions. They are there to be paid attention to, rather than dismissed, like the dashboard of our car. More often, we stuff our emotions, and we identify with them, letting them dictate who we are, and then we use them to criticize, judge, and enroll others in our stories. Have an honest tantrum and get it over with! But this doesn’t mean use someone else as a punching bag. It means express that you are upset, hurt, and angry. Mistakes? Take the “wrong” turn and you will learn something new. I know. I am queen of making mistakes!
Go for Satisfaction. This may make you uncomfortable, but it will increase your Bliss Factor. It’s much less comfortable living in your own skin knowing you’ve walked past a plethora of opportunities. And there are plethoras. You owe it to yourself.
Laugh. As often as possible.